How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
