He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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