GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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