You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
