you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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