dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
