it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
How does one acquire holy water?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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