what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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