we should wear snuggies to the strip club
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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