we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
