He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize