we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
i just google imaged poop.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize