just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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