you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
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is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
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There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.