she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I'm at about main and main street
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
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