I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I just cut my nipple shaving
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
this will be a night to untag.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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