Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Randomize