? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
