Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
