this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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