After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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