Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
