okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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