well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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