I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
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He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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