babies were throwing up all over the place
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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