I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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