the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
