I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Randomize
