i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
