Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
