I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
