idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize