FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
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