So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
