I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize