ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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