So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize