i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
