careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
