We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
