I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
