hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Randomize
