i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
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Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
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I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.