My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Drunk is not a location!