Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
