I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Sorry about my life...
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