sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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