i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
