Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
