i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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