I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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