So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
